Dear reader,

We have made it to a new year! That means we have all either entered or just exited a state of contemplation around the topics of reflection and future goals. For some, it is a cause to celebrate growth, and for others, it may be hard to reconcile reality with past hopes and dreams. 

As I wrap up the year myself, I have found that I am fixed between both conversations -- teetering whichever way the wind blows. 

I made the recent discovery that God's will for my life goes hand in hand with my willingness to make an effort. In my humanness, I flounder, but with the Lord's strength, I can prevail; however, both are the results of taking a step. I cannot passively grow with Jesus. For that reason, I beam with gratitude at the year behind me! I recognize that each of the milestones I accomplished were made possible through the active pursuit of glorifying God. Personally, I graduated university, got married, moved to Ontario, learned how to cook (growth only comes when we take a step... and I didn't take a step until I was 22 years old in this department haha!), turned a house into a home, hosted friends and family, travelled to Asia, and got my first adult job. 

I am humbled by the adventure of 2024 because of its grandeur, but also because I couldn't say the same if it weren't for the gift that my husband is to me. We have always paid attention to the fact that God made us so fundamentally different, but I didn't notice just how significant those differences were until I looked back and saw how I'd grown with his support. Yes, I suppose I would've graduated... but outside of that, let me flesh out the rest of the year. I got married TO Lincoln, moved to Ontario BECAUSE of his job, learned how to cook FOR him, created a home to BENEFIT him, hosted friends and family WITH his help, travelled to Asia BECAUSE of his boldness and relationships with others, and got my first adult job BECAUSE he exercised great patience and faithfulness by praying with me and encouraging me to pursue a job that was purposeful. I praise the Lord for the way He establishes His plans for us through our friends, families, and local communities; furthermore, I praise Him for the way He molded Lincoln's heart. 

And if you have read this far and are starting to think, "Well, I thought she said that she was grateful and having a hard time...," tune in for this upcoming paragraph.

As I reflect on my past year, I notice that most of the notable parts of it were never once a goal of mine. I couldn't have dreamt of that year, instead it came to me because the Lord gave me a passion for wanting to serve my husband and Lincoln had giftings that I did not. I adore his ability to cast a vision, but it made me realize that it is a shortcoming in my life. I often pride myself on my ability to be present moment to moment, which is a gift in itself; however, I neglect the current truth that many-a-times I lack focus on the big picture. And truthfully, that made me a bit disappointed for the year to come. Not that I don't believe God will accomplish great works, but that I am entering a new year with no big goal on paper that I can work towards. In high school and university, each year seemed well structured and decided, and now I am independent... and lacking direction. To any of my readers who have felt the same, I empathize with you. That is not an easy place to be. Yet, we don't have to buy into it because it is not the truth. 

Sitting in my church service this past Sunday, the Word of God that my pastor shared washed over me with conviction. I was embittered toward what I felt that I lacked when I was reminded that the foundation for my faith started with humility. In Matthew 5:3, Jesus proclaims, "Blessed are the poor in spirit, for theirs is the kingdom of heaven." He did not charge us to "dream big" or "achieve great things," but rather encourages us to walk humbly before the Lord and to be faithful in doing so. This Scripture directs believers to focus on our eternal reward rather than what the world has to offer. 

Why should it matter to me that I don't have plans for what's next? Why should it matter to me that others do? When did my focus become comparison to my neighbor and fall from the most honorable goal I could ever have: growing with Jesus. Is that too small? 

Was it small when He gave His life to save my soul? 

No. No, that was the most grand, pure, awe-filled act of love and mercy that I could've ever undeservingly received. How beautiful that I could spend my year pursuing a relationship with Him and living a life pleasing to the Lord... 

The next day I came across a quote from D.L. Moody which reads,

"There are many of us willing to do great things for the Lord, but few of us willing to do little things."

"Well said, and well delivered," my heart responded to the Lord. THAT is what I'll do. Daily acts of faithfulness and a pursuit of God that step by step will shape me into the woman He so desperately wants me to become. After all, 2024 was a roadmap for the same type of work -- no clue as to what would happen, but a heart that sought God daily... and look what He did! 

I by no means endeavor to speak ill of those who were given the gift of seeing the bigger picture, because you bless those of us who are in need of it; however, I do want to encourage those of us that feel like we have much to offer without an idea of where its best used right now. It is praiseworthy to trust in the Lord and be steadfast in our daily work. There is great joy to be found in doing the little things for the glory of God! 

I want to leave you with a question to ponder... "How many people do you know who 'shot for the moon and made it' without a journey of their own?"

January 7, 2025